9 weeks 2 days

I keep thinking that maybe I have swine flu ... then I remember, no no, I'm just pregnant :)

7 weeks 6 days

What a beautiful end to a crappy couple of days! I've been feeling really yucky the last two days -- but my appointment today went fabulously!!



Here's the first pic of 8 week baby:



Baby is upside down ... so it's head is at the bottom, and it's booty is up top by the +1 sign. That dark space in it's head is part of the brain forming, and if you looks super close to the left of the body you can see it's tiny leg sticking out!



Here's pic two that shows the heartbeat -- it was about 173 which is mega-high, but it will go down as the pregnancy continues. It was a beautiful thing to hear -- I didn't cry until I was heading home -- it did make my mom tear up!


Other good news is that because everything looks so good, and my cyst in my ovary has gone down, we've graduated from our RE and get to go back to seeing our regular OB now!! My OB did her residency under my RE, so he was excited to have me tell her hello and that we got preg. on our first cycle of FSH injections.


So - my appointment was a beautiful reminder of why I don't mind feeling as sick as I do!!


"I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you." - Genesis 28:15

7 weeks 3 days

I feel like death.

Pregnancy is the perpetual hang over ... without the fun of long islands and dancing the night before ....

For one of my besties - Rachel :)

In your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall. Psalm 18:29

I've been thinking a lot about the struggles of life and how we get so caught up in them, we forget to step back and look at the big picture. It's a concept I have obviously struggled with for the last year ... well, and years before that.

The mountains that we must climb seem steep and never ending - we all know and have experienced that in some way. And in different season of our lives, those mountains look different. Whether it's making it through the preparations for a wedding to come out the other side with a strong, beautiful marriage -- or surviving pregnancy and childbirth to end up with a precious child -- it's so easy to get wrapped up in the process and forget to focus on the goal. And even if we are focusing on the goal, we often forget to add Him into the mix! But if we can figure out how to mix the two together in a true, honest relationship, once we reach our goals, we'll look back -- and that mountain will look like a hill.

And then we'll turn to face forward and bring on the next mountain -- right?!?

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. Isaiah 43:2, NIV

6 weeks 3 days

Spring Break has been fantastic - as it's given me time to lay on the couch all day long because I feel so sick. How on earth am I going to start teaching 4 year olds on Monday while feeling like this?!? I think that women need maternity leave - and morning sickness leave.

The whole healthy diet thing also doesn't work well when nothing sounds good - but you only feel not ill when you're eating ... not surprisingly - pizza is still my favorite :) Nick made us oven pizza for dinner last night - and it was the best cheese pizza I've had in my life I swear!

I know I wanted this - and I'm not taking that back - but I cannot believe I have atleast 6 more weeks of feeling like this ... who knew pregnancy could feel like this (I know, I know ... you knew and you told me) How can one person feel so blessed and so tortured all at the same time!

5 weeks 6 days

One teeny tiny baby ~ One beautiful heart flicker!!

The baby is actually inbetween the two cursers (which you can also barely see). It's right at the bottom of the big dark sac - below the round thing that looks like a head but is just the yolk sac - only 3mm big! How can anything the size of a chocolate sprinkle already have a heartbeat ... a heartbeat that we could see even?? Only with God's hands and God's eyes - that's for sure! Dr. McBaby said everything looks good - he tried hard to get the heartbeat on the microphone (amazing that that "wand" they shove up me has a microphone on it) but it's just too early. We go back in two weeks to check in and make sure everything is still going good. I don't know which would be more nervewrecking ... not even getting an appointment until 12 weeks like most women - or getting them more often. As Nick would tell me - there's no point in worrying because it's all going to be fine, God is Good. And he definately said "I told you so" several times after we saw the beautiful heartbeat today!

"Brothers, as an example of patience in the face of suffering, take the prophets who spoke in the name of the LORD. As you now, we consider blessed those who have perservered. You have heard of Job's perserverance and have seen what the LORD finally brought about. The LORD is full of compassion and mercy. " James 5:10-11

5 weeks 3 days

"They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty, and I will mediatate on your wonderful works. They will tell of the power of your awesome works, and I will proclaim your great deeds." Psalm 145:5-6

I haven't been clear in my expression of our good news.
I haven't been saying the most important thing first.

This pregnancy is a Gift from God.

And when the worrying of miscarriages and birth defects try to attack me - I remember that this wouldn't be possible without Him- and if He wants something to happen, it will happen. And He wanted this pregnancy to happen.

This baby is so loved ... by Nick and I ... by our family and friends ... and by God and Jesus. It doesn't get much more amazing than that!